The Light Beyond Bereavement Forum Bereavement StoreMovieBlogSympathy Ecards
Kindness in another's trouble, courage in your own...

Go Back   The Light Beyond Bereavement Forums > Loss of a loved one > Loss of a spouse or partner > Young widows and widowers
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Thread Tools Display Modes
Old March 25th, 2013, 04:05
mellzy123 mellzy123 is offline
Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 1
Default what do i do...

my partner of 6 years died in a car accident 3 days after xmas at the age of 22. he left behind our son rouger 2 and a half and our daughter who was only 8weeks old at the time. im so lost as to what to do with my life and how to be there for my children while trying to take time out for myself as well. I feel like I haven't started to grieve properly yet im so busy with the kids. our son has started getting very angry and emotional all the time and it upsets me coz I don't know what im meant to say to him or how to explain things to him. I would love some advice on what to do...
Reply With Quote
Old March 25th, 2013, 06:11
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 1,144

hi mellzy i am so sorry for your loss my heart goes out to you so much you must come on here and talk to us as much as you can we have all lost our loved ones understand all the emotions you are going through we will be here for you
i will be back on here later if you need someone to talk to i will send you a pm
your son is picking up on your grief there is no way you can hide it from the children your loss is too great but one thing you must not do is compensate his loss with getting out of your usual routine letting him get away with things you normally wouldn't as children pick up on it and its bewildering he won't fully understand whats happening i know how strong you have to be to do this when your heart is crumbling your frightened yourself but love and as normal as possible as you can be in front of them will help children of that age take a lot of energy to look after and you have the baby as well is there any family member that can help you
i and others will be here for you you whenever you need us
love hazelx
Reply With Quote
Old March 25th, 2013, 09:08
gumek gumek is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 746
Default Hello

hello mellzy, was very sad to read your message today, there arn't enough words to say, very sorry for your loss, and wanted to welcome you to forum. i do concur with all that hazel has said, you will be supported by friends who understand your pain and will be here for you, please also allow your friends and family to help you in any way they can, they will want to be there for you and the children.

when something like this happens we none of us have answeres and we can go round in circles trying to find them, we have these times of such intense grief and anger and confusion, we cant see how we will ever cope again but i can give you some comfort in that in time things will get easier for you but right now you willn't be able to recieve that, i couldn't but further along things have become easier for me and they will for you too my love.

please allow your tears to fall, this will help you, come and talk here when you have need, it may help you, we are here for you, i pray for you to be comforted and strengthened.

sending love and hugs

chrissie. xx
Reply With Quote
Old March 25th, 2013, 12:23
tom-fisherman tom-fisherman is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Northwest England
Posts: 534

Shalom in Yeshua Mellzy123 and welcome to the forum. I am sorry to hear of the death or your partner and the effect is is having on you and you children. Please know that I have already said a prayer for you to be comforted.

You are doing the right thing by getting on with things as this will help in the short term. Your son does not know or understand what has happened. All he knows is he cant see his dad. You need to sit down with him and talk to him about what happened and re-assure him that you and his dad still love him and always will. He just needs you to love.

What I would suggest for you do is talk to your partner when the children have gone to bed. Even if you dont believe in life after life it does help, so give it a try. Get into a routine of spending a few moments with him each day. It is also very important that you share your feelings with you family and friends, and talk here too. We all want to help you.

May God bless you
Reply With Quote
Old November 14th, 2013, 17:13
monkey12 monkey12 is offline
Junior Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 13

im so sorry for your loss. I have been there my husband was 21 when he was killed and he left behind our 2 year old son. Just calmly explain that daddy is looking down from heaven keeping u safe. It is the hardest thing in the world to deal with. Know that you are not alone. You are more than welcome to private message me whenever and I will do what I can to give you what advice I can.
Reply With Quote

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:57.

Copyright 2017 The Light Beyond. Visit the main site at