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Old January 3rd, 2009, 19:11
Rattiemama Rattiemama is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 2
Default Support Groups for Gay Widows Near Oceanside, CA?

I am writing to you all to try and help my uncle. His partner of over 52 years passed away yesterday and he is interested in finding a support group. He would feel far more comfortable with a setting that was gay friendly or exclusively for gay people.

Do of you know of any groups or organizations that might be able to help him? He lives near Oceanside, CA and is in rather poor health, so dirivng all the way to San Diego proper (45 min) is too much for him. Any help is appreciated. Thank you in advance.
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Old January 4th, 2009, 07:55
luciestorrs luciestorrs is offline
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 137

I am so sorry for the loss of your uncle's partner, what a great loss for him to suffer, and especially after so many years together. My deepest condolences.

There is another thread here which may be of some help:

I also found this very useful program which matches infirm gays and lesbians with volunteers who commit to making weekly visits:

"Long overlooked by society at large, and even by younger gays, elderly gays and lesbians are emerging as distinct community, getting more help and attention as they confront challenges that differ in many ways from their heterosexual counterparts..."

If your uncle's health is declining I thought this program might also be of assistance, and would help him to know that he is not alone.
Lucie Storrs, creator of

Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep: over 250 funeral poems, quotes and readings
If There's Anything I Can Do...: full of practical ways to help the bereaved
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Old January 4th, 2009, 23:39
Rattiemama Rattiemama is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 2

Thank you for your response. The thread you linked to is what lead me to post here in the first place. I will definitely contact SAGE, the group from the article you linked. They seem to be mostly based in New York, but may be able to help.

My remainin uncle (not my biological uncle, he is the one who passed) does have assistance 5 days a week here at the house, but still, a visitor from SAGE might be a nice thing for him. Perhaps they will know of support groups. He specifically wants a bereavement group, and I want to get him as much support as possible before I have to go home.

Thank you again for the help, and if anyone else has suggestions, please speak up!
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Old January 5th, 2009, 04:10
Dancer Dancer is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 200


I'm in the UK and can't help you out with support groups, but I just wanted to join with luciestorrs and say that I'm sorry for your uncle's loss. My deepest condolences. I hope he finds the support he needs at this sad time.
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