View Full Version : Am I normal?

April 19th, 2008, 04:55
My boyfriend of four years died suddenly and unexpectedly a week and a half ago. Our relationship was very amicable. Some days I thought we would be together forever and other days I decided that we might split up one day. Because we got together so young I sort of hoped that we might split up for a couple of years so that I could have a chance to date other guys and then we could get back together and do the whole marriage thing when I hit 30. We had rows sometimes and I wasn't always an amazing girlfriend but I was pretty good.

Anyway after he died I spent three days wandering around in shock, unable to eat and cried quite a bit but not loads. However since then, including yesterday at the funeral ,I've cried a little bit but hardly at all. People keep telling me how well I'm coping and that they're proud of me but I feel fine. I do feel lonely and sad that he died but I'm not in pieces. I feel like I should be greiving loads and crying the whole time, not just because he was boyfriend but because he was my best friend too. What's wrong with me?

April 19th, 2008, 18:51
Firstly, I'm sorry for your loss. The reason you may not be crying all the time suggests you are in shock and you are normal. After my mom died unexpectedly 8 months ago, there were times I felt like crying but no tears came. I'd say I was in shock a good 3 months. Of course everyone's different but I think everyone goes through this stage of shock, denial or disbelief. Some revert back to it now and then. You will know when that stage is over. For me, reality has set in and it's depressing and at times difficult to cope. Grief is a process. My thoughts and sympathy go out to you at this very difficult time. Rachele

April 19th, 2008, 23:47
I'm sorry for your loss. If you aren't normal, than none of us are. I am pretty sure everyone here has gone through that feeling at least once. I lost my grandma 2 & a half years ago & still go through every emotion there is. I lost my grandpa a month ago but I feel different about it. She was sudden & his death was more expected. It still hurts just differently. Anyway if you need me I'm here.

May 11th, 2009, 13:30
I'm sorry for your loss. Why your boyfriend died? Yes you are in shock they are right. Why you plan to split him up?

To find another guy? What's wrong of you?
You said you love him but you want to find another guy?

Will that's your fashion. And now you are 100% free to do what you have plan.

Sorry again. Try to read this http://www.thankgodforebooks.com/husband-died.html it will help you..

Good luck to you

June 5th, 2009, 04:13
I m so sorry for your boyfriend. I think you had suddenly shocked thats why you are not crying. I think you are normal now.