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baglady1st
August 4th, 2014, 01:09
This past Friday Aug.1st marks the one year anniversary of my sweet husband's death. The entire year leading up to this date I would have given anything to join him but not at my own hand. It was a long and painful year for I missed him so much. Anyone that knew us knew we were especially made for one another. I honored his passing at 1:48 am central time and asked anyone who knew us to take a moment of silence at 8 pm central time and think about how he affected their lives. Then I asked for those same people to post how he made them laugh or feel on facebook. I read them and laughed till I cried. I then posted to others to share how they made him laugh. It was so therapeutic for me that today I can say I will live on.
Do I want to be here without him? No, but I guess that choice isn't mine to make. I do however look forward to the day we are with each other again. For now, I'm going to live and make the best of it. Blessings to all.

hazelharris
August 4th, 2014, 14:54
hi my friend thankyou for your message know our thoughts are with you as you start on this second year of grief many of my friends on here see the passing of the first year as big step into the future some days will still be filled with sadness but at this point we know life has to be lived again and we seek even more to fill our lives with some happiness it's everything our loved ones would wish for us As you quite rightly say we have no choice it's now a life we didn't choose but you have so many wonderful memories and friends that will lift you out of this sadness and back into a reality to be optimistic for your future I send you my love and prayers that this coming year will be filled with a peace of acceptance strength from memories and love from friends and family xxx

baglady1st
August 8th, 2014, 23:30
HazelHarris, I cannot express enough how posting stories about my deceased husband on facebook has helped in the process of moving forward.
I have gotten great responses and posts from many that knew and loved him to those that knew him years ago. There still isn't a day that goes by that I don't yearn for his laughter and touch but making others smile and think for just a moment how much he influenced their lives is so rewarding.
When we all marry the efficient says till death do us part. I say even in death we do not part and will be together again in the afterlife. My current dilemma is those trying to fix me up. No way am I ready nor even want to indulge in any relationship for any reason other than friendship. I won't imagine ever falling head over heals in love with anyone else. It hurts to much when they leave. Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. You are a true asset to this forum.

hazelharris
August 9th, 2014, 17:09
thankyou maria your husband sounds a wonderful man with many good friends who are helping you enormously i'm thankful they are giving you comfort your words reminded me of something that happened last week i was asked if i had a husband and i said no he died and i was mortified as to why i said those words all of us who's loved one is in heaven they are still ours husbands are still husbands wives still wives just because they reside in heaven doesn't mean we have lost them it's just we can't be physically together until we meet up with them one day and then we can spend eternity together i was wrong to say that and i soon corrected myself we have their love with us that never leaves us because love always finds a way to be felt and gives us such comfort as we go on without their presence It's not right when friends and family start this matchmaking and try to encourage us to find a new love everyone feels differently we all take our own time to adjust to look for another is a mistake love is usually where we don't expect it many on here have felt the same as we can't contemplate feeling love like the one we have in heaven but i think they try and work some miracles for us because they love us so much they want us to find some happiness again one day in the future out of the blue this miracle may happen for you some special person may find their way into your life you have to grab happiness if it comes with both hands protecting yourself from hurt or rejection is not living Life as we all on here know is too short we must just go forward with whatever lies in store for our future iI pray you continue finding life more bearable as the days and months go by all my love hazel x

baglady1st
August 9th, 2014, 23:11
Words of wisdom my dear, words of wisdom. No way, no how will anyone fill my baby's shoes. I don't want them too. We have known love and lost them to their passing. You and I know we will see our honeys again. If anyone had the same type of relationship that I have with my husband should post their favorite stories about them. Are you on facebook? If you are send a friend request and you can read my interpretation of Brent and mine's life together. You will laugh and you will snort while laughing. My facebook page is Maria Murdock. He and I were in true marital bliss. Some stories might seem raunchy but take a gander anyway. Thank you once again for your kind words and understanding. I wish I would have gotten on this forum just after my honey died. I might have been able to handle things better.

baglady1st
August 9th, 2014, 23:13
One last thing, who in the he@l coined the phrase closure? You never find closure, you learn to live with it. Period.