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- Home Page - Death, Grief And Loss
Someone you love has died. And, like so many others, you are discovering that a death can rob you of so much more than a person you love. It robs you of your energy, your hope, and sometimes just of the simple will to get up in the morning. Why not let us help you?
- Forum
It helps to talk; sharing your grief and sadness with others in our bereavement forum can lighten your load. What's more, showing kindness in another's sorrow helps you find courage in your own. Why not come along, browse a little and see how the forum could help YOU?
- Practical guides to help you cope with bereavement
Select from our range of practical guides to help you cope with grief and bereavement. Currently, we offer an ebook of over 250 sympathy poems, quotations and readings, and a guide to helping a friend or relative who has been bereaved cope that little bit better.
- If There's Anything I Can Do... how to help someone who has been bereaved
Want to help, but just don't know how? Our guide for the friends and families of the bereaved shows you how to help without getting in the way. It is full of little ways, and big ways, you can help someone you care about cope that little bit better.
- Sympathy flowers and funeral flowers
Flowers are a universal gift of sympathy. Whether you are searching for funeral flowers for the service or sympathy flowers for friends and family, our Teleflora store has a wide selection of arrangements to choose from in all price ranges.
- How to choose sympathy flowers
There's something about the life and beauty of sympathy flowers that illuminates a house that has been darkened by a death. Flowers comfort the bereaved with their beauty, and give hope. The following guide clarifies the process of choosing the perfect flowers to express your sympathy for a funeral.
- Sympathy flower etiquette
Choosing a sympathy flower or funeral flower arrangement can sometimes seem rather confusing, and people often worry about inadvertently causing offence. This page answers some of the frequently asked questions on this subject.
- Bereavement books from Amazon
A wide range of recommended bereavement books on all kinds of loss-related topics, from coping with grief, the death of a child, the loss of a parent or death of a partner through to grief books for men, children and teens. Pet loss is also covered.
About the Light Beyond movie
Find out more about the Light Beyond movie, which is based on the funeral poem Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep. This page also contains the full text of the poem.
Books
There are so many different books available to guide you on your journey through grief; our Amazon store features many of the books we recommend. We hope you find them helpful.
Blog
The Light Beyond blog offers further inspiration, healing and hope for those who have suffered the pain of bereavement. It also provides a way for you to interact with us by leaving comments or posting your own story on the blog, to help others in their journey.
Send a free sympathy ecard
Send one of the free sympathy ecards based on our inspirational movie. We have also included a guide showing you what to write in your message of condolence.
- How to write a sympathy card
When someone loses a loved one, the simple, thoughtful gesture of writing a sympathy card or condolence letter can bring great comfort to the bereaved. Read our simple guide and discover what to write, as well as what not to write.
The Light Beyond grief library
Our grief library is full of free, practical information which covers all aspects of death and dying, from what needs to be done in the days following a loss to arranging a funeral, coping with your grief, the legal aspects of death, practical matters and much more.
- Coping with your own grief
A death can rob you of so much more than a person you love. It robs you of your energy, your hope, and sometimes just of the simple will to get up in the morning. The articles here provide strategies and resources to help you cope with your grief.
- Death and grief: when will you start to feel better?
After the death of a loved one, remember that there is no set time for you to mourn your loss. Bereavement is a process, not an event, but the important thing to remember is that you will start to feel better. This, too, will pass.
- 10 strategies for coping with grief
Grief is a personal experience, unique to each mourner and unique to each loss. Grief comes in waves, as times of peace and calm are suddenly shattered by overpowering emotion. The following strategies provide a few suggestions to help you ride out the waves as you cope with your grief.
- Men, grieving and sorrow
The elements of grieving, including sorrow, crying and the expression of emotion, go against many of the typical traits we think of as being masculine, such as strength, pride and toughness. This is just one of the reasons men find it difficult to mourn.
- Will grief counseling help me recover from my loss?
Dealing with loss and the grief that follows is often a very painful process. Find out if grief counseling may help you work through the painful reality that someone you love has died, and help you find a safe haven in your loss.
- Bereavement and grief: practical ways to find consolation
In the early stages of bereavement and grief, the bereaved may have difficulty viewing life beyond the here and now. As they move forward, the various practical steps outlined here will help them amass the strength to recover.
- Pet animals provide comfort in grief
Pets have an amazing ability to provide grief support to those suffering after the death of a loved one, or for people facing terminal illness. Discover how loss and bereavement can be eased through the loving companionship of a pet animal.
- Coping with the grief of others
Remember that when someone talks to you about grief, the best thing you can do is listen. It isn't a problem that can be solved, and it's not up to you to help them move on. They'll do that on their own.
- How to console a grieving friend
There are many ways to help the bereaved during the grieving process. As a friend, it is important to be there during this difficult time. Read this page for helpful and practical ideas for helping your friend through their bereavement.
- Grief in the workplace
When a coworker is experiencing grief due to the loss of a loved one, it can be hard to approach him or her to express your condolences. Read our simple guide to showing your sympathy in the workplace.
- Practical matters following a death
After a loved one dies, it is especially difficult to think clearly and perform all the tasks at hand. Friends and other family members provide support in your grief. They can also aid in dealing with the business affairs that must be accomplished after a loss.
- The practicalities of death
The time immediately following a loved one's passing is always difficult. Not only must you cope with your grief, but the "business" details of their death as well. To relieve the additional stress of the unknown, it is crucial to be informed regarding what is expected after a death.
- Organ donation: what should you decide?
Organ donation may relieve some of the pain of your loss. Knowing that, even in death, your loved one has helped someone else to live is a powerful healing tool. It will not remove your grief, but it will provide some comfort at giving another person a chance at life.
- Understanding the autopsy process
When a death occurs, there may be several reasons for an autopsy. An autopsy will be performed if there is a possibility that the death may be a homicide, if the cause of death is not known, or sometimes if the death occurs in the hospital.
- Death of a loved one: what will viewing the body be like?
The death of a loved one is always difficult, and it may seem scary to view the body of the deceased. However, it may help you find some amount of closure if you do. Read this page to help you decide whether or not to view the body.
- How to file and obtain a death certificate
To alleviate additional stress caused by tending to the "business" details of a loved one's death, it is important to become knowledgeable. One of the first tasks that must be accomplished is filing and obtaining a death certificate.
- How to write an obituary or death notice
An obituary and death notice are written as a way to honor the deceased. They share a small amount of information with the public and may also contain a funeral notice so people know where to pay their respects or send sympathy cards or flowers.
- Tying up loose ends after a death
The death of a loved one is always a heart-wrenching event. Dealing with all the aspects of putting the loved one's affairs in order can appear insurmountable. It is important to remember that the process will take time and it is not necessary to accomplish all these tasks immediately.
- Funerals: everything you need to know
With all the details that must be managed when a person dies, it's easy to feel overwhelmed, and it may be too much to handle when you are still reeling from grief. A little knowledge helps; here we reveal everything you need to know about funerals.
- Making funeral arrangements
At some point, most of us will be called upon to make funeral arrangements. Perhaps you'll make your own while you're still healthy, or maybe you'll be called upon to plan a funeral for a loved one. Understanding the choices involved will help you to be prepared.
- Funeral procedures: dispelling the mystery
Many people don't know what to expect the first time someone close to them dies, and this can add to the burden of grief. The best remedy is to learn what happens from the time of death to the funeral and time of cremation or burial.
- Funeral etiquette: customs across cultures
When a friend, neighbor, or coworker from another culture dies, it's helpful to understand the rituals and customs of that culture in regard to funeral services and expressions of sympathy. The funeral information here will help you to honor those customs and extend your condolences appropriately.
- After a death: what happens at a wake
When a person dies, family and friends often gather together in the hours or days before the funeral to view the body, share memories of the deceased, and comfort and support each other in their grief. This custom is known as a wake.
- Planning a funeral service
Funerals are for the living. Although that may seem obvious, it's an important fact to remember when planning a funeral. Nothing will make grief disappear. What the funeral service can do, however, is allow mourners to begin healing by sharing their loss and commemorating a unique and precious life.
- Choosing songs and music for a funeral service
The music played at a funeral will live on in the hearts and memories of those who attend. Appropriate music is an important part of a meaningful funeral service, and will comfort and inspire guests as they celebrate the life and mourn the passing of the deceased.
- How to write and deliver a eulogy
The purpose of a eulogy is to pay tribute to the deceased and his unique talents and gifts, who will live on in the memories of those who loved him. By sharing your honest, heart-felt thoughts and memories about your friend or family member, you will help begin the process of healing that lies ahead for the living.
- How to choose a funeral home or funeral director
Choosing a funeral director used to be a very simple matter, and was typically based on church, cultural or ethnic affiliations, family tradition, or reputation. Today, community ties typically are not as strong as they once were, and selecting a funeral home has become a more complicated process.
- What determines the funeral cost?
Arranging a funeral involves decisions about one of life's biggest purchases, third only to buying a home or a car. Most of us would never consider making such a big purchase in an emotional moment, without investigating our options; yet every day, thousands of people do just that.
- Choosing a burial casket
The most expensive item on a list of traditional funeral costs is easily a casket or coffin. Choosing a coffin can be the most difficult part of arranging a funeral, perhaps as it gives an immediate reality to the death to see what will be your loved one's final 'home'.
- Funerals - what different types are available?
Funerals all over the world are steeped in tradition. Every detail of a traditional funeral, from caskets to prayers and music, is influenced by religious and cultural customs. Today, however, the number of traditional funerals is slowly declining as more people choose alternative funeral services and burial options.
- Funeral pre-planning: a practical matter
Although facing the inevitability of one's own death may be perceived as disturbing, there are many reasons people choose to arrange their own funerals. Planning one's own funeral is a final act of love, as those who plan their own funerals relieve their loved ones of a tremendous burden at the time of death.
- How to decide between burial or cremation
Since ancient times, religion, tradition and local custom have determined whether people of various cultures cremate or bury the dead. If you're planning your own funeral or a funeral service for a loved one who left no final wishes, here are some issues to consider when choosing between burial and cremation.
- Memorials: a tribute to your loved one
Memorials come in many styles and are known by many names: headstone, gravestone, tombstone, grave marker, or monument. Although each term has a slightly different meaning, they all describe the objects we create to honor the memory and pay tribute to the life of a deceased loved one.
- Choosing a cemetery
Many people view the selection of a final resting place as an important personal decision, and so may decide to choose a cemetery themselves well in advance. Whether you're purchasing your own burial plot or one for someone who is dying or has already passed on, this information will make it easier for you.
- Death, the law and you
The legal aspects of death (such as wills and probate) can be somewhat confusing, especially as you are trying to cope with your grief at the same time. Let us demystify some of the common terms and concepts and make your task a little easier.
- Where there's a will, there's a lawyer: probate law demystified
In probate law, the legal language can be very confusing. Probate has its own terminology that, though essential for you to understand, can be mind-boggling in its complexity. Once you grasp the legal language, it's not that difficult.
- What if there is no will?
What happens if your loved one dies without leaving a will? This is where the law of intestate succession comes in. The legal heirs will be determined by a probate court and the estate will be distributed to those heirs.
- Making a living will
A living will takes your most personal decisions out of the hands of others. It gives you the freedom to choose for yourself how to best end your life and the chance to maintain your own values regarding the quality of life.
- Your guide to making and understanding a will
The very kindest thing you can do for all those who love you is to make your passing easier by leaving a will. Read this page for an example of how wills are written and what they generally contain, and how to go about making a will.
- How to avoid probate court causing family problems
After going through the death of a loved one, the last thing you want is to struggle with your family. Unless you talk about the estate beforehand, the probate arena can become a stage on which family issues may play out.
- I'm an executor of a will - what do I have to do?
If someone close to you has died and you have been named as the executor of that person's will, yours is a very special obligation. You have been entrusted to carry out the final wishes of your loved one regarding his or her estate.
- Coping with the death of family members
Don't let expectations – whether your own or others' – tell you how or how long to grieve. The death of a parent, child, partner or sibling has a tremendous emotional impact and healing takes place only when you allow yourself to confront your feelings.
- Coping with the death of a parent
When a parent dies, surviving children face more than the loss of a loved one. Whether the survivor is a young child or mature adult, the death of a parent changes life forever. Healing takes place only when you allow yourself to confront your feelings.
- Death of a parent: supporting a grieving surviving parent whilst grieving yourself
As a child, you have to deal with very grown-up topics after the death of a parent. You are dealing with your own grief, the death of your childhood in a way, and the temporary loss of your other parent as a strong force in your life.
- Coping with the death of a spouse or partner
The death of a spouse or partner brings incomprehensible grief. Adjusting to your new identity will take time, and the journey may seem unbearably sad. Find support in others as you work through the stages of grief and learn to live with the changes in many areas of your life.
- Coping with the death of a sibling
Losing someone you love is never easy. Because each person in our lives plays a unique role, each death leads to grief. And while the loss of any relationship leaves a gaping hole, the death of a sibling creates an especially tender void.
- Children: coping with the death of a child
The death of a child is one of the most painful types of losses. It takes a great deal of hard work for the bereaved parent to move on to the point of recovery. The emotions brought on by the death of a child should not be suppressed in order to journey through grief in a healthy way.
- Coping with the death of a child
The death of a child brings about a period of deep, unimaginable grief and a time of uncertainty as the bereaved parent struggles with this new reality. No one expects to outlive their child; life as the bereaved parents knew it no longer makes sense.
- Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS)
The words Sudden Infant Death Syndrome strike fear in the hearts of parents. In the US alone, it is a horrifying reality for the bereaved parents of approximately 2,500 babies per year. Although SIDS has decreased by over 50% since 1983, it is still the leading cause of death in infants from 1 month to 1 year old.
- Stillbirth: an invalidated loss
One in every 116 babies delivered is a stillbirth. These are sobering statistics and one that many parents are unaware of. Grieving parents' existence is irrevocably changed by the loss of a child. However, as this page shows, it does not mean that they cannot go on to have a life that has meaning and purpose.
- Coping with miscarriage
A miscarriage is the term given to any pregnancy that ends prior to twenty weeks' gestation. Regardless of why the miscarriage has occurred, it is important to mourn the loss of the child that "could have been."
- Children: helping a child cope with death
Not only do you have to find the strength within yourself to get through a loss, you also have to support your children through their grief, all while keeping the household from falling apart. These articles aim to make your task a little easier.
- How to tell children of a death
Death breaks our hearts; it is hard enough to explain things to ourselves, let alone a child, and to work through our own grief. Here we suggest ways in which you can tell a child of the death of a loved one.
- How to help children of all ages through grief
Children of different ages react to the death of a loved one very differently. Here, we cover how to explain to children, from infants to teenage years, that a death has occurred and how to help them through the grieving process.
- Helping children cope with funerals
A death in the family brings up many questions about life for a child. One of the biggest at the start is, "What is this funeral thing I keep hearing about?" It's best to explain what funerals are, and involve your child in the planning.
- Helping children through grief whilst grieving yourself
Grieving can be especially overwhelming for parents. You not only have to find the strength to deal with your own grief, but you have to support your children through it. How do you provide hope to your child when you've lost your own?
- Teens: ways to console a grieving teenager
It's often hard enough being a teenager without having to cope with grief on top of everything else. These articles show ways in which friends of the grieving teen, as well as adults, can provide help and comfort to them in their distress.
- Suicide: dealing with the aftermath
Perhaps the most important thing for suicide survivors to keep in mind in the midst of their grief is that suicide is a personal choice, and no one's fault. Let us guide you through what to expect after a suicide, and how to handle it as well as you can.
- Coping with the suicide of a loved one
We know that death will come for us all, but it seems especially traumatic to cope with a loved one's death by suicide. The suicide of a loved one is different from "natural" death in some ways, and we will cope in different ways. Not better. Not worse. Just different.
- Practicalities of dealing with a suicide
As if being a suicide survivor isn't enough, you must also deal with your loved one's funeral or memorial service, burial or cremation, the probate of the estate and obtain a death certificate for insurance purposes. How can you cope?
- Dealing with survivor guilt after a suicide
"Why did he do it?" is the first thing you think when you find that your loved one died by suicide. Survivors often feel they did not do enough to save him or her. These feelings can leave the family with persistent concerns that are referred to as "survivor guilt."
- How to explain suicide to your child
The grief and sadness that you feel when a loved one dies by suicide is also felt by child suicide survivors. Do not be afraid to face suicide and the grieving process directly and honestly with children; read this page for guidance.
- Suicide prevention
If you are on this website because a loved one has already committed suicide, then we are truly sorry. This section of the site may be painful for you. However, we are trying our best to save lives, so please forgive us...
- Suicide is not the only option: read this first
Are you thinking about committing suicide? If you are, please stop and read this letter. I know that suicide is a personal choice, and no one can stop you if you really want to die. Just hear me out, OK? Then you can decide for yourself what you want to do.
- Suicide risk assessment
If you are a friend or relative of a person you believe may be contemplating suicide, it is wise to heed the warning signs shown here and err on the side of caution. All too often we hear the words: "I didn't think he meant it."
Deaths caused by drunk driving
Mothers Against Drunk Driving, a victims' advocacy organization, calls drunk driving "the nation's most frequently committed violent crime." And another NHTSA statistic reveals that three in ten Americans will be involved in an alcohol-related traffic accident in their lifetimes.
- Coping with deaths caused by drunk driving
When someone you love dies in a drunk driving accident, the tragedy is compounded by the fact that death came as the result of a senseless criminal act. You may find that the circumstances surrounding the death add another measure of anguish to your loss and require additional coping measures.
Deaths caused by violent crime
If you've lost someone you love in a violent death, you've endured an incredible blow. The uncommon circumstances surrounding your loss may make leave you feeling isolated and alone. Although all of us will experience the death of a loved one at some point, few will suffer the kind of terrible, senseless tragedy you've suffered.
- Coping with deaths caused by violent crime
Over 45,000 homicides occur in the US every year, the result of everything from child abuse and domestic violence to robbery or arson. When a death by violent crime occurs, survivors often experience a range and depth of painful emotion unlike anything they've ever known.
Coping with pet loss
The grieving process for pet loss tends to follow the same stages of grief for the loss of human loved ones (denial, bargaining, anger, sadness, and acceptance). However, sometimes it seems like no one understands how hard it can be to lose an animal that you loved so much.
- Pet loss and how to deal with it
With your pet's death, you may feel lost and alone. However, most pet owners would rather experience the grief of their deaths than not have all the joy they give us over the years. Here, we list strategies to help you cope with pet loss.
- Helping children cope with pet loss
There is something deeply profound in the grief that some children feel following the death of a pet. Adults can more adequately distinguish the difference between their love for people and pets, but for a child, the lines can be less clear. They may need your help to deal with pet loss.
- Practical information about the loss of your pet
Pet loss is a painful emotional experience, but there are also some practicalities to consider. As much as we dislike thinking about it, most pet owners believe that they owe their companion animal not only a happy, healthy life but also a peaceful, loving death.
- Pet memorials: a lasting tribute
In death, we can show our love and appreciation for the pets who enriched our lives immeasurably by means of pet memorials. These ways of celebrating the life of your pet range from hand-crafted memorials to commercial creations that are customized for your pet.
Death and dying: a broader context
Renewed relationships, along with the opportunity to witness the transformation that takes place as a loved one prepares for death, are the things that lead many to describe the death and dying of someone close to them as one of the most spiritual moments in life.
- Death and dying: coping with terminal illness
The diagnosis of a terminal illness deals a profoundly shocking, staggering blow. During this time, the person with a terminal illness needs the love and support of family and friends more than ever. Yet too often, people distance themselves from death and dying because they are afraid to face their own fear and pain.
- Hospice care: support for the dying
Death, like birth, is a natural part of life. The growth of the hospice movement and the wide availability of hospice care provides a peaceful and comfortable transition for people with terminal illnesses at the end of life.
- Being present at a death
The thought of being present when someone dies can be frightening. Learning to recognize the signs of imminent death, knowing how to talk to the dying person and what to do after death occurs will help alleviate your fears and allow you to stay with your loved one through the closing of the circle of life and death.
- Life after death: hope in a time of sorrow
Since ancient times, humans have found hope in the belief that life continues in some form after death – a belief that continues for most people today. Eventually, it seems, any discussion of death and dying will lead to discussion of an afterlife: a life after death.
Coping with loss in general
Loss does not just mean the loss of a loved one as a result of death; in life, we have to cope with many different types of losses. In some cases, the coping strategies are the same as or similar to those for dealing with bereavement.
- Coping with general grief and loss
The words grief and loss bring to mind for most people the death of a loved one. We are often surprised at the complexity of grief that occurs after a divorce, separation, loss of a long-held job, retirement or diagnosis of a chronic illness.
Genealogy and death records
Genealogists want to insure that their family's lineage is recorded for present and future generations. Knowing where to locate death records is crucial for those who are tracing their family tree.
- Death records: a valuable resource for genealogists
Death records help to locate information regarding one's ancestors. The death records or information pertaining to the deceased can be located through Social Security death records, genealogical websites and probate records.
About us
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Contact
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Make the most of your ebook
Our digital products are supplied in the form of Adobe PDF files. This page shows you how to open, save and print PDF files, and also how to print individual pages. We also demonstrate how to search through a PDF file, making it easy to find what you are looking for.
The Light Beyond FAQs
You can find the answers to some frequently asked questions here. Can you think of anything else you would like to know about The Light Beyond? Why not ask us!
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Tell a friend about The Light Beyond
Why not help us spread the word and tell others who are grieving about The Light Beyond, with its bereavement forum, free grief library, inspirational movie, helpful blog and many other resources? Visit this page for a quick and easy way to tell your friends and family.
Grief and bereavement links
Useful grief and bereavement resources and links to help the bereaved and those who care about them. You can also recommend a resource or add your own site here.
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