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Old May 30th, 2010, 12:31
CarlyBoo CarlyBoo is offline
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Join Date: May 2010
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Default Lost My Nanny....

Hey I'm new here, My name is Carly and i'm 22 years old.

About a year and a half ago I lost my nan....

She was in a wheelchair, hadn't been able to move her legs since she was 25 years old and had many other serious health problems i.e. collpased lung, M.S. and severe depression from being in and out of hospital constantly.

My gran was a major part of my life and my two siblings life, as we lived very close to her, and were always on hand to help her should she need it (and boy did she need it!) We saw her every few days, constantly going out for meals and such. She lived on her own, so was very lonely and loved spending time with us three and my mother. I moved away from my family from London to Burnley so was very difficult to see them regularly which had its effect on me. Aswell as them. She loved to call me up every week and regularly sent me letters. She was my best friend and for some reason i felt more comfortable to talk to her about my problems than i did my own mother. She was always there and I miss her more and more every day.

She died just weeks before Christmas and the circumstances in which she died hurt me even more. She was 61....

A few months before she died she has spent 2,000 on a new central heating system which was supposed to keep her warm through the harsh winter nights. This failed constantly, and repairmen finally came and fit a replacement. The last time i saw her she told me she wanted to commit suicide and that life wasn't worth living, which really hurt me....
The boiler system failed on the Friday, she phoned for them to fix it and told her the earliest they could come out would be Tuesday... Monday morning she was dead.....Pneumonia. I'm hurt and angry that they let this happen to her....I now live in Guernsey and every day I think of her, life is good but for me I can't live a day without feeling lost or bewildered because my best friend has gone. I don't feel like it is going to get better and it's ruining my life. I miss her terribly and need her more and more every day. Some days I still expect her to phone me.

I don't see a way out of this. I miss her too much...
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