The Light Beyond Bereavement Forum Bereavement StoreMovieBlogSympathy Ecards
Kindness in another's trouble, courage in your own...

Go Back   The Light Beyond Bereavement Forums > Coping with grief > Moving on after a loss
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #11  
Old April 18th, 2008, 11:02
Bonkers Bonkers is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: NE corner of Kansas
Posts: 32
Default

I still hold an awful lot of resentment and anger. Seems it is the only thing that keeps me going at times. I'm angry at my brother for not helping more and being the son to Dad that he always wanted and since I was the second born girl--couldn't fulfill that dream. I am resentful that Mom and Dad catered to my brother because he was the youngest, the baby and the only son. Very typical of farm families (I think) to want a son.

I hold so much anger and feelings for not being able to care for my parents myself. I know that I couldn't possibly lift them or carry them---but still I wanted to take care of them. I just feel like life has dumped on me big time--no matter what I want or what I feel I should do--I can't get it done. So then I feel even more hurt and more angry.

I know anger can be a good emotion if the energy from anger is channeled into something good-- or it can be bad if allowed to run rampant---but how do I make it become good? Anger is passion isn't it? Or can be?

I am just so full of anger and if it doesn't come out and get channeled will eventually implode I would think.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old April 18th, 2008, 20:28
Rachele Rachele is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 372
Post

You can't allow the anger to build up and fester, otherwise you end up projecting it onto others or turning it inward on yourself. Neither is heallthy. I spoke in one of my posts where my anger was so deep I started driving recklessly - not good at all. You have to let it out whether it be punching a pillow or bag or talking to someone or putting your feelings down on paper.

You know about you feeling that you wish you could have cared more for your parents than your siblings may have. I think many people tend to feel they could have done more or something different for the ones who have passed. I also think it's the little things that mean most. If you showed them care, love and concern as a daughter than that's all anyone can ask of you. You were a good dauthter and they would be proud of you. Hugs, Rachele
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old March 19th, 2012, 05:17
gumek gumek is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 746
Angry chrissie

Hello Rachel, if it's ok may I add some of my experiences with anger since my hubby died before christmas last year. Since Giuls died I have had thoughtless comments from church members, things like" he isn't your husband now, and , we don't greive like others without hope, why don't they get it, WE MISS OUR LOST LOVED ONES and we are human with hearts that hurt, I have felt like being quite rude to them for their lack of sensitivity. I have reminded them that even Jesus wept. I hate having to wear a mask for people at church cos they can't face up to the fact that God made us to have an out let called bereavement, " A time to mourn", and it is natural and neccesary for us to move on. Thanks for listening, I need to mop up the puddle of tears that I am sitting in.

shalom chrissie.
Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 04:14.


Copyright 2017 The Light Beyond. Visit the main site at www.thelightbeyond.com