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  #1  
Old December 20th, 2013, 18:53
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
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Default peace and love to you all at christmas x

last year many friends on this forum lit christmas candles daily and said their own prayers for our loved ones spending christmas in heaven through our sadness we all came together giving one another strength comfort courage and a bond of friendship which helped us to face christmas without our loved ones this year we have met many new friends who face the same grief and have to find their own strength this coming week it's not easy when your loss is recent Family and friends talking and sharing will lessen the pain try to remember our loved ones wish is for us to be happy again they need us to find some joy in life again especially at christmas i hope your precious memories of christmas past will give you some comfort and make you smile again this smile will be your gift to them may you feel their love from heaven with you for love will always bind you together
to all my friends past and present i light my own candle this christmas for all your loved ones in heaven i wish you all peace and to friends who have moved on and found joy again in their lives a merry christmas love to you all hazel xx

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=87q5dmW6zDg
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Last edited by hazelharris : December 20th, 2013 at 19:11.
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Old December 21st, 2013, 14:06
j's daughter j's daughter is offline
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Lovely video, Hazel. And I wish you a happy time this year, too!

My Mom was the last of the family to go. She died in September 2010. The first Christmas, a friend was with me and the chat helped pass the time. Christmas 2011 and 2012, I was alone, and I will be alone this year, too. Well, alone with Poppy, the cat that adopted me last January, after my feline companion of 16 years died. Poppy has adjusted well to her new home, and has taken me well in hand!

This is the first year since my Mom died that I felt like noticing Christmas at all. I celebrated Sinterklaas Day by myself on Dec. 5. (The Dutch mark that day, and I celebrated by getting in some Dutch goodies almond paste cake, a good Dutch cheese, and typical Dutch cookies.) This is the first year, too, that I felt like even noticing Christmas. I have put up a little artificial tree (I live in an apartment, so real trees are not allowed). Must say, I am very much enjoying the little lights when they come on in the evenings. They do brighten my mood, although it is also very easy for me to end in tears when I think of the family now gone. My heart does ache sometimes. Both parents, and my brother, have died. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins ... all gone. Just me left of the family.

I agree with you, Hazel, our loved ones would wish for us to smile. They would not want to be the cause of our sorrow. I can imagine my mother saying, "Remember me with smiles and laughter, for that is how I will remember you!" And to honour her, I do smile, even if it's through my tears.

I, too, will light a Christmas candle, and think of, and thank, those here who've helped me through my own grieving time. I can't honestly say that time is over yet. Perhaps it never will be. But I am able to look up from my loss, and able to see light ahead, through the darkness.

If anyone else here is sorrowing at being alone this Christmas, or being without the loved ones you miss so very much, please know my heart and hand are out to you. I do understand how very difficult life is for you just now, but I promise you, with each passing season, the sorrow eases a little. I wish you peace, a lighter burden of grief with each passing day, and the warmth to be found within a circle of others who care.

Thank you, Hazel, for posting. And may you receive the gifts of peace and acceptance this year.
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Old December 21st, 2013, 14:43
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
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my dear friend sometimes i wish more than anything we lived closer to one another because you would never be alone at christmas i would fetch you to come and join me and my family poppy as well my daughter always brings her 2 dogs and 3 cats i'm so glad poppy came into your life this year we never feel completely alone with out pets they offer such love and companionship
i will message you on christmas day i know the time is different where you live but i hope it will offer you some comfort to know you will be in my thoughts
love to you Hazel xxxx
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Old December 22nd, 2013, 19:16
j's daughter j's daughter is offline
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Hazel, thank you for your response. It's good to have friends across the world!

Last night and today so far have shown me how very blessed I am compared to some. I live in Toronto, Canada, and we have been hit with a massive ice storm that has resulted so far in 250,000 people in Toronto without power. The ice coats tree branches, and branches and whole trees are falling, some of them onto power lines, causing massive power outages all over Toronto. The branches and downed power lines block streets, making it hard for emergency vehicles to get through. Two of our hospitals are without power. Part of our transportation system is down. Streets and sidewalks are ice-covered and dangerous. (The storm affects much of eastern Canada and the U.S., not just Toronto.)

Incredibly, I look out my window and see that the nursing home across the road still has lights, and the building I live in still has lights and heat, but other buildings all around have been dark and cold since last night. The street lights are out, so night time is very dark outside, and very dark in all the buildings I can see from my windows.

I feel so fortunate. I have enough food, including food for my cat. I have emergency battery-powered lanterns to provide light, and blankets for warmth, in case this building loses power (everything is electric so if the power goes, we lose lights, heat, water, cooking facilities, everything). They say it could be 3 days before power is restored to those who've lost it, and I am well able to look after myself and Poppy (the cat) for a few days, without needing to call emergency people.

So far, since we still have power, I also can use the Internet, and can get news updates from television. As I say, I feel so very fortunate compared to many thousands who are cold and in darkness for a second night. I needn't go out, needn't brave icy streets. I can imagine there are many people far less fortunate than me, on their own in dark and cold houses and apartments.

And all of this is so close to Christmas. It should be a happy time of the year, and there are so many people sorrowing, having difficulty on their own. It has been a very good lesson for me. I do compare it to the darkness and coldness of losing my family, and think there must be some purpose in this one building I am in being left with light when all around me are in darkness. I feel very looked after!

I wish for everyone to be in the light, in more ways than one!
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Old December 23rd, 2013, 15:34
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
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i was very concerned to hear of this devastation in Canada where you live it must be very frightening for yourself and a lot of people i hope you can make someone aware how much food you have left just incase the power goes and you can't contact anyone if the heating goes i hope the emergency services will come and help but obviously wrap up if you have newspapers put them over the windows it preserves heat wear a hat my wooly one would do i would be sending it to you if i lived near if you haven't got one use the tea cosy (sorry trying to lighten the mood a bit for you )but we lose most of our body heat from our head so cover up i wish i was able to help but love and thoughts are with you and all those suffering the consequences of this dreadful weather please keep us posted how you are love hazelxx
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Old December 23rd, 2013, 20:18
j's daughter j's daughter is offline
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Hi Hazel,

Things are improving here for people. There is still power in the building where I am, and a few of the neighbouring buildings got back their lights and heat about an our ago. That means they were without power (no lights, no cooking, no heat, perhaps no water) since Saturday evening. It's now Monday evening here. A long time to be cold in the dark. I still carry a flashlight just in case my power goes off, but I am more confident that things are okay. I'm saying prayers of thanks to the God who looked after everyone no deaths were reported as a result of the storm and prayers of thanks to all the workers who knew what to do, and just went and did it in the very cold weather.

Lots of tree branches to still be cleared away from our streets. Lots of icy sidewalks still, but life is manageable if you have light and warmth. I was half-prepared, having flashlights and battery-operated radio and battery lanterns. But I realize I need to stock up on food that doesn't need to be heated. I'm on the 25th floor of the building, so if power fails, we also don't have elevators running. Don't much like the notion of walking down and then back up 25 floors!

I so much see this as a lesson to be prepared for life. We can't control the weather, any more than we can hold back the loss of our loved ones or our grief that follows such a loss. Everything happens in its own time. Life is teaching me that.

There are still 195,000 people without power in this city alone. They are hoping to have it all restored by end of the week, which means that some people will be spending Christmas in darkness and cold. Just as some spend it in those conditions each Christmas, and each day, after the loss of a loved one. I certainly understand more today than I did yesterday!

Thank you for concern and warm thoughts, Hazel. It's appreciated. Poppy and I both have a warm place for our heads tonight, and food enough. I will definitely be stocking up on food, in case this happens again. It's only the beginning of winter here.

Hope everyone is warm and living in the light tonight!
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Old December 24th, 2013, 13:55
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
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hi my friend im glad things are improving slowly but surely you are so right in your analysis of our situation in life things happen good and bad and we just have to go along with it the best we can i had to do 100 balloons for the church this morning and i spoke to the vicar about how it was over there and he assured me he would include you all in his prayers tonight well here we are christmas eve still got many things to do i hope all our loved ones in heaven hear our prayers of love that we are sending them and will know we are thinking about them my candle is lit for them all love hazel xxx
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