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  #1  
Old November 26th, 2012, 13:18
cal821 cal821 is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 477
Default " Why Do You Come Here??"

I'm just curious why most people visit The Light Beyond Forum ?

The reasons I come here have changed, multiplied, fluctuate, not only from my first day I found this forum, but from day to day.

Lots of times I feel sure I take more than I give, but I hope that some of what I've given has helped someone. And now, what I 'take' isn't always the same as what I used to look for or come away with, and I wouldn't expect it to be, after almost 5 years widowed - I would feel myself that I had a problem if I hadn't healed enough to enjoy a joke or a discussion unrelated to being widowed. I'm at a point where 'widowed' is something I am, not all that I am.
Where does your reason fit in?

Share grief experiences ?

Give and receive support ?

Memorialize spouse/partner?

Find humour ?

Debate controversial subjects?

Other personal reasons?



As always I wish you Peace


Cal821
__________________
Memory can only tell us what we were,
in the company of those we loved;
it cannot help us find what each of us, alone, must now become.
Yet no person is really alone;
those who live no more echo still within our thoughts and words,
and what they did has become woven into what we are.

I wish you peace and a level path on your journey...

Cal821

Last edited by cal821 : March 9th, 2016 at 12:28.
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  #2  
Old November 26th, 2012, 16:00
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
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Posts: 1,144
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hi dave that is a good question i have asked myself as a lot of good people come on here accept the help and move on and that is good as it's what the site is all about
i came on here the lowest time of my life and friends here who didn't know me offering such love and compassion is something i will never forget we think ok we are over the worst is it time to move on and then we can get thrown down again when we least expect it
i stay here as my friends are forever friends people i hope always to keep in touch with as i would miss them we are like a family i don't want to sound like some exceptionaly good person i am the same as you and most on here but i want to help others i remember all the hell i don't know wether i help a lot but i need to be here for those in despair i understand the loss of a loved one we feel life has ended and i want to be there for them and show there is a light at the end and life will go on for them eventually it just takes time
love to you dave hazelxx
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  #3  
Old November 26th, 2012, 16:46
gumek gumek is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 746
Smile why do i come here

hello
i came here in march 2012, looking for someone, something to help me in what was the worst time in my life. i tried other orgs but was told of a waiting list of three months. i might add that this was a machine telling me this but it was 3am at the time. i left a sarcastic message.

for me all the points on the list apply, i found people going through the same pain of loss who related to it as they knew first hand what grief is like.

i found acceptance no questions asked

i found friendship from complete strangers

i found humour, which is odd as we were all falling apart like a cheap suit

i would come on here in the middle of the night to find kindreds also here
and if we had gone out looking the way we did in our communities at 3 am, we may have frightened someone to death, we could have produced a horror film.

we swapped fast food ideas because we couldnt face cooking and eating and hazel threatened us with pizza if we didnt eat, very scarry.

im sure haze wont mind me saying this, will you love? she went to work one day with odd shoes on.

why do i keep coming here, well this life event has changed me all so much, tried to escape twice but cant stay away.

what does one do with the sadnesses of life, well, some of us stay around on forum to see if we can give to others freely what we have freely recieved. we have had no training in schools, only the school of life, and life is hard at times, ent it? i
i think that something good must come out of something so devistating as losing a love, a spouse, a child. a parent, a friend and a much loved pet and i found it here.

im one of lifes prayers, my friends call me camel knees, and many have no one to remember them in their prayers so for me it is one of lifes privelages to do this for heartbroken souls.

why do i keep coming here, we are all accepted, no questions asked, no tests to fail, just be yourself, one can stay awhile till the storm lessons or like some of us, take up residence for a little longer. be blessed.

hugs all round.

chrissie
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  #4  
Old November 26th, 2012, 17:02
Clarabelle Clarabelle is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Outside Glasgow, Scotland
Posts: 65
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I came here in April 2012 because I was so distraught that nobody I knew could help me and also because sometimes it's easier to talk to a stranger than to loved ones when the one you have loved the most turns out not to be who you thought they were and it's too late to confront them......

I have met some of the kindest, non-judgemental, caring, friends that I could ever have hoped to meet in a lifetime. I also met, for one day, A woman who gave me a "story" which explained the unanswerable questions that I have to live with and who literally helped me to knock through the brick wall behind which I was trapped, to let me remember the love again which my husband and I shared for 30 years of being together.

Along the way I hope that I have been able to help, in a small way, other people suffering from the devastation of bereavement, by just being here.

Why do I keep coming back? I don't want to let my friends here go,ever. We laugh, cry and pray together and we keep each other close. We're a family now.

I am so sorry for the new friends that I make here, people whose pain hadn't started when I set off on this journey and I wish that we didn't have to meet like this, but it's the greatest comfort that I have had.

Thank you to all my good friends here. I love you.

Clare xxx
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  #5  
Old November 16th, 2013, 04:20
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
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Posts: 1,144
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i came across dave's thread today and thought i would reply again as it's one year since we replied and things are different here now
so why do i still come on after all this time is it because i'm stuck in grief no and my best friends here who i love and shared every day of our grief talking for months with support tears and laughter through our sadness have gone that was hard to bear but it shouldn't be as the purpose of them being here was support and having the strength to move on and they did i felt guilty feeling so sad but leaving was inevitable in the end
so now after 2 years of my loss i am still here why well i can't rest thinking there is someone grieving and they need a friend i remember the pain so vividly it's unbearable i know i don't have the capability of erasing pain and suffering all i want them to know is someone here understands all it takes is a few minutes a day nothing more and it may make a difference to someone
so today my dear friend dave the answer to your question is just because i care xxxx
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  #6  
Old November 16th, 2013, 10:25
Whitehorse81 Whitehorse81 is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 57
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I was actually late in my grief when I arrived here. I was on my second year of grief (I found the 2nd year harder then the first) when I found this site. When I came, I found kind people who shared the same feelings and understood what I was going through. I've been widowed 2 years now.

Now, I come here to help others who are hurting. Before I answer a message, I pray for God to guide me with the right words to say that will bring peace to this person. I've learned by not focusing on me, I am moving forward. And when I log off here if I have left a message, I have a sense of reward that I am helping another person understand they are not alone in their grief.
Hugs...
Jacquie
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  #7  
Old September 29th, 2017, 11:29
cal821 cal821 is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 477
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bump up for a re-read
__________________
Memory can only tell us what we were,
in the company of those we loved;
it cannot help us find what each of us, alone, must now become.
Yet no person is really alone;
those who live no more echo still within our thoughts and words,
and what they did has become woven into what we are.

I wish you peace and a level path on your journey...

Cal821
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