Thank you for words of encouragement. My father passed away over 10 years ago and I had only my mom. I am single parent and can't say I have a partner/boytfriend. I have friends/colleagues who have been very helpful in helping me cope but I fear that I am giving them too much burden and I try to be brave but then, the pain, the loneliness comes back and it consumes me. I have two sisters living with me who are older than I am but they too are grieving in their own way. At least I talk with the other but other than that no one is talking about it at home except my son who is 10 years old (sometimes).
It's like they think she's gone and there's no point in talking but I can't even pray at times. I find my lips move but my voice does not come out and tears just pour. I wish I could ask God when will this pain go away and when will I ever be happy in knowing she's at peace. I can't help but feel like she's not gone, that she'll be back, that she's visiting. Everytime I think back I find myself crying. It's like no one at home knows how I feel. When I think back I feel her pain deeply but at the same time, I want her back, I would've taken care of her in anyway, like I did. I miss her SO SO much. I miss buying newspaper, magazines and colleting her medication. I miss going everyhwere with her. How do I go past the pain and loneliness?
Thank you Tom listening.